RecRadioNation

My Corona, a Parody

Ooh, my little viral one, my viral one
Am I going to catch you this time, Corona?
No place to go to make my motor run, my motor run
‘Cause they canceled my airline, Corona

Always get a dirty look, when I cough
I always get a dirty look, when I sneeze
Ah, ah, ah,  ah, choo!
M-m-m-my Corona

The face mask makes it harder, hard to breathe
Now you can only see my eyes, Corona
CDC’s keeping it a mystery, it gets to me
Hazmat’s down past the length of my thigh, Corona

Always get a dirty look, when I cough
I always get a dirty look, when I sneeze
Ah, ah, ah,  ah, choo!
M-m-m-my Corona
M-m-m-my Corona

I hope I never catch it.  No not me
Or is it just a matter of time, Corona?
Is it d-d-destiny, d-destiny
Or is it just a game…my Corona?

You approach the theater to see the new Matrix film.  You go inside, but immediately get a sense of the surreal.  You approach the box office window to buy a ticket and say, “One for resurrections.” “That’ll be two hundred and fifty,” says the cashier. “Two hundred and fifty bucks? This thing is a gold mine,” you say. “You must be new here,” he replies. “Yeah, I just moved in,” you say. “This is the most amazing movie ever!” says the cashier. “I cannot believe they made it. I’ll tell you what, I’ll let you buy a ticket at one hundred fifty. What do you say?” You’re thinking it over when you feel a sudden burning sensation on your arm. It’s so strange, you look down to see that the cashier is now wearing a mask of your own skin. You quickly turn back around and run out of the theater. As you go, burning skin continues to cover your entire body. It’s not long before the rest of the theater staff is after you. They all seem to have masks of your skin as well. You try to escape them, but they continue to come after you. They corner you in an alley and beat you savagely. Finally, you’re left barely alive and barely able to walk. You see the same people from the theater again as you’re led to the hospital guarded by the police. One of the cops is a woman with crimson face paint who gives you a knowing look as you’re taken into the emergency room. A week later, you’re still in the hospital. The doctors had a hard time diagnosing you, since you showed no signs of physical trauma. Instead you were deemed a “psychological case” and sent to a mental ward…

You’ve heard about the ‘Let’s go Brandon’ T-Shirts, but who is Brandon?  You don’t have a clue.  News is not a part of your life unless there is a story out about Dave Grohl or Britney Spears.  Sealing yourself up for over a year did not help either.  The one thing that has been consistent, though is your collection of T-Shirts.  You have some 200 of them, including a Led Zeppelin 1979 Backstage Pass T-Shirt.  Your need to collect more is drawing you towards the ‘Let’s go Brandon’ T-Shirt.  However, with no knowledge of the subject matter, you remain unsure.  The internet is down T.F.N., so no help there.  If this T-Shirt is to be had today, you must go out in the world and do what you hate most.  Ask perfect strangers for information about ‘Let’s go Brandon’.

You pick the library first, walk in and ask the reference desk person, “What does ‘Let’s go Brandon’ mean?” “Um, it’s the name of a T.V. Show I think.” says the young librarian. The second choice is no more appealing. You will have had to go back out into the world and ask someone else. You walk out and begin what is now your daily routine, walking down the sidewalk, looking in store after store, hoping for some sort of answer. After an hour of this, you realize you can hear a T.V. Show mentioning ‘Let’s go Brandon’ in the background. You begin to run towards the sound of T.V. This is the only lead you have, so you hope it pans out. After one block, you begin to notice something peculiar happening. While running, you look down at your feet. You seem to be covered in hundreds of little ants, which are all scurrying away from you. You look up and notice the same thing happening on the street and sidewalk. They are all running away from you, in the same direction. You begin to hear people screaming and yelling behind closed doors. You don’t want to start a panic so you keep walking and ignore the problem. You stop a passerby and ask, “Do you know what ‘Let’s go Brandon’ means?” “Nope, sorry”, says the passerby. “Do you?” “I’m a sanitation engineer, what do you think?” the passerby asks, annoyed. “That’s not an answer!” “It’s the only answer I have.” At this point, you realize the passerby is right. You don’t know what to do. You can continue this futile quest, or you can go home. Go home and try again tomorrow. You decide to go home. You walk to your apartment and enter. You go to your room, take off your shoes and socks and put on your pajamas. You lay in your bed and shut your eyes. A few hours later you awake and realize that you still don’t know what ‘Let’s go Brandon’ means. You go to your computer and do a search for it. This is when the internet begins to work! You type ‘Let’s go Brandon’ into the search bar and hit enter…

You haven’t worked in almost two years.  Time that has been either spent in the house amusing yourself or online playing games and exploring the virtual world.  You have been compensated by so many county, state and federal programs you have not been concerned with paying rent, utilities or grocery bills.  However, there is trouble on the horizon.  The safety net you’ve enjoyed is beginning to disappear.  Starting with the cessation of extra benefits at the federal level, your direct deposits are scaling back.  What do you do?  They certainly don’t expect you to get a job, do they?  Why would they have bestowed to you these benefits for over 18 months if they expected you to work?  After much contemplation, you decided that the best course of action will be to go find more benefits.  You head out into the world to fulfill this quest.  You approach a government building.  You push the doorbell.  The door opens and you ask the person standing at the door, “Where do I get additional monthly benefits?”

You continue to ask people this question and they direct you to various rooms where you can sign up for various programs. One woman even gives you her employee badge so that you may go into the system directly. You thank her and she replies, “No, Thank YOU! We have a brand-new member now!” You make note that this is not the same response as before.

In fact, they are downright friendly to you. The family that was giving you hassle when you first got off the bus has gone inside. You can hear them having fun in the video arcades. If you had stayed, they would have started throwing you pennies.

You enter the system. You are handed a badge, told what time to be in and where to report on your first day. You make note that there are cameras all around the building. They will no doubt see you on the security cameras entering and exiting the building with your new badge. After a few weeks of this routine, you are working in a new department.

But wait, you did not want to work.  You just want free benefits.

You realize that you shouldn’t have accepted this position. You want free benefits, and this is how you are going to get them? You can’t believe you fell for their routine so completely.

A few months pass and you get a call from the human resources department. You sit down in the little conference room for a familiar routine. You look at the huge gift basket on the table. You haven’t gotten any benefits in over a year, and they know it. They also know that you won’t be seeking any type of employment. They would like to offer you a “gift”, but under no circumstances is this to be treated as a bribe or reward. It is simply a “good will” gesture toward your years of dedicated service.

You have not agreed to this meeting to try to gain any sort of special consideration. You have simply agreed to it so that you may continue to receive your free benefits.

You are under no obligation to accept and have told them as much. They are careful in their response.

THEY: Thank you for being a valued customer for over fifteen years. We want to make sure that you will not suffer in the transition to a new welfare program. If you accept our generous offer of a one-time payment in the amount of three hundred dollars, we can assure you that you will never have to worry about money again.

YOU: (sarcastically) That’s great! I’ll just be leaving soon anyway.

THEY: (smiling) No, but you will have enough money for basic needs and can pursue an education or begin a new career.

YOU: (dubious) What’s in it for you?

THEY: (smiling) You are a valued customer and we want to continue to serve your needs.

YOU: This seems like an odd way of showing it.

THEY: (smiling) But that’s why it’s a goodwill gesture, to you as well as to you as an employee.

You have a choice here. You can accept their benefits for now and stop looking for work for as long as you want. You’ll also get a small raise in pay. This would be a small amount of money, but you’re used it that. You’d also basically be working for free while they continue to hire and train your replacement. This would all stop if you found work elsewhere.

You can decline their generous offer and get a severance package from their HR department. This would be much smaller and you’d have to quickly find work to avoid falling into hardship.

You can also refuse both offers. This will end your relationship with the company and result in you filing for unemployment after you leave. You’ll be able to easily find new work, but you’ll go without for quite some time.

You can choose to silently weep or curse the company out. Either way, this meeting is over.

Genesis, better see them while you can…

It is no secret that Phil Collins has health issues.  Informed sources have reported him saying that he can barely hold on to drumsticks anymore.  However, with help from his son, Phil hit the road for the last time with Genesis.  Their tour kicked off September 20, 2021.  Included are 12 dates in the USA.  If you are a big fan or just super curious, this is mostly likely your last shot to see them live.  Best wishes to the group for an epic tour!

Since words are our tools, it always interests us when they begin to strike a chord, so to speak.  The statement, “RecRadioNation at recradionation.com.  Please listen responsibly.” has caused quite a few inquiries as to what it may actually mean.  On the surface, one may ask, how does one listen to a radio station responsibly?  At the risk of getting over complicated, this liner and the others heard on the station are primarily a play on words.  They were created with the intention of  having many layers of meaning, some actual and some implied.  In the case of “Please listen responsibly”, it is primarily a joke take on the required public service message on ads for alcoholic beverages.  As for the rest of the meanings, we will let you speculate as to what they may be.

Our Favorite of the latest station player apps available to RecRadioNation listeners has got to be the myTuner Radio smart phone app.  What sets this one apart is the artist photo feature that displays above the title and artist information for each song.  This looks pretty cool.   Also, when you connect the app to a car with an infotainment center using Bluetooth, for example, the metadata information including station, artist and song appears on your car’s screen.  We think that this is a nice touch in the motoring comfort and convenience category.  To download the app, using your smart phone, go to this link: https://mytuner-radio.com/radio/recradionation-481534/  When the site opens, you will be prompted to download the app.  You can also get the app at Google Play and the App Store.

 

If you are on the West Coast of North America, it looks like you are out of luck on finding a Clapton show near you, though.  Yes, Hollywood means Hollywood, Florida.

Eric Clapton U.S. Tour 2021

September 13 – Fort Worth, TX – Dickies Arena
September 15 – Austin, TX – Frank Erwin Center
September 17 – Houston, TX – Toyota Center
September 18 – New Orleans, LA – Smoothie King Center
September 21 – Nashville, TN – Bridgestone Arena
September 23 – Atlanta, GA – Gas South Arena
September 25 – Tampa, FL – Amalie Arena
September 26 – Hollywood, FL – Seminole Hard Rock

We are happy to announce a new affiliation with myTuner Radio.  Besides the ability to download an app for your smart phone, you can access RecRadioNation directly by clicking this link: https://mytuner-radio.com/radio/recradionation-481534/

Our thanks goes out to myTuner Radio for adding us to their station portfolio.

You’re waiting in line to get gasoline because of the pipeline shutdown.  You see a man with a shotgun standing by the pump, and you decide that it’s probably best if you don’t go near there.

The next day, you hear about a shooting at the gas station. A guy with a shotgun shot up the place before he was killed by police. The whole town is on edge ever since then.

A few days later, you see a bunch of people running from something in the woods. They look like they might be cannibals or some other kind of monsters. You turn around and go the other way.

Soon, the whole town is in an uproar. A “zombie” attack happened right in the middle of town. People are running out of the store and out of the gas station, saying that a “gargoyle” came out of the woods and attacked them. Nobody knows what to think. Some people think the attack was just part of a marijuana-induced hallucination, or that it was some kind of government conspiracy.

You don’t know what to think either. Cannibals and monsters in the woods? A government conspiracy? It sounds crazy, but what else do you really have to go on?

You have no choice. You have to stay in town for now. You’re ready to fight, but you’re going to have to be careful. You hear a rumor that the “zombie” was really a werewolf. You decide to keep your weapon handy.

The whole town is on edge, with police keeping a tight grip on everything. You can’t go to the supermarket without getting harassed by them. They have you going from store to store with your papers, and you get turned away from everywhere. You’re pretty much limited to staying in and preparing food. It’s not much, but it’s better than being bored.